Archive for October, 2009
IHSAHN is HOT
Ihsahn, the former guitar player/vocals for Black Metal legends Emperor, will soon be releasing his third solo effort. Titled “After”, he’ll be joined by both the drummer and bass player from crazy ass German prog band “Spiral Architect”, whom I had presumed dead years ago. He’s also got a sax player in the mix. He used 8 string guitars as the basis for songwriting in this one, so it’ll be interesting to hear his approach, even if “The Adversary” didn’t really do much for me (I never bothered with “AngL”).
Also, Ihsahn has got to be metal’s sexiest dude. I mean I’m not gay, but I can recognize a good looking man when I see one. And Ihsahn is fucking smoking. Makes me wanna rip off those classy suits, throw those bad boy sunglasses away, knee down and suck his dick. Figuratively speaking of course.

Here’s the track list for “After”:
1. The Barren Lands
2. A Grave Inversed
3. After
4. Frozen Lakes on Mars
5. Undercurrent
6. Austere
7. Heavens Black Sea
8. On the Shores
You can look at more sexy pictures of this hot piece of Norwegian ass over at his MySpace.
HEAVENLY gets new drummer, reveals new cover art
Seriously, who in the fuck listens to Heavenly? I’m afraid I do. Their “Dust to Dust” album is a Power Metal masterpiece, and even though the followup “Virus” kinda sucked, I still care.
According to the interview-challenged staff at MetalStorm, Thomas Das Neves (drummer) decided he had had enough of the gay and decided to leave the french outfit. Fortunately, power metal drummers in France are a dime a dozen and the guys have a found a replacement in Pierre-Emmanuel “Piwee” Desfray, who used to perform percussive duties for fellow metal countrymen “Fairyland”. Pierre said that he was looking to join a band with a less homosexual name, but with substantial fagness nonetheless.
Also, they got the cover art for their next Opus, “Carpe Diem” up on their site. Check it out:
Semi-naked chicks? Seriously? You’re not fooling anyone guys.
Metalscape CXXI – Semi-Latino Drum Beatz
A brand new Metalscape with teasers for the brand new Ronvaldr and Zachrebuff!… that came out already… shit, my bad. Chipmunk Ron makes a short appearance as well.
Playlist:
Diablo Swing Orchestra – Lucy Fears the Morning Star
Welicoruss – Slavyanskaya Sila
Decapitated – Mandatory Suicide
Slayer – Unit 731
Melechesh – Rebirth of the Nemesis
Akercocke – Breaking Silence
Buckethead – I Come in Peace
Arcturus – The Throne of Tragedy
Metalscape CXXI - Semi-Latino Drum Beatz
RONVALDR & ZACHREBUFF ARE BACK!
That’s right motherfuckers, The Greatest Metal Podcast of all time brings you yet another episode of the Greatest Fantasy Podcast Series!! (or whatever R&Z might be called)
And what an episode it is! Over 22 minutes of complete and utter kick ass action, mystery and thrills, Metalscape style. Have a fresh pair of underwear ready, because you might just crap yourself while listening to this one.
I would like to give special thanks to GoGo for lending us his beautiful Swedish accent for the making of this absolutely fantastic piece. If you have a decent enough mic and would like to participate in future R&Z episodes, check out this thread. Enjoy!
Nachtmystium set to record “Black Meddle II” in January
Now we all know “Black Meddle Part I” was fucking unbelievable. But even though the name implies it, I had totally forgotten about a part II . I was content enough with the other one I don’t think I can handle two of them. Here’s the post from their MySpace page.
“We’re currently working on material for ‘Black Meddle Part II’ (official title to be announced) and will be doing a demoing pre-production session with Sanford Parkerin October.
“The new material is reminiscent of ‘Assassins’ with more of a rock and roll edge over all. Our love for post-rock and industrial (ala MINISTRY, KILLING JOKE, etc) is even more present this time around.
“Recording for the new record will begin in early January and we project to have the record out in March or April.”
Nobody tell Malefic, I think he’s still upset about those sweet red shoes.
World Painted Blood
If this was the actual album art, I’d buy it instantly and declare Slayer as the greatest metal band in history:
As seen on The Sheriff’s album “review” thread. If anyone knows the original source of the image let us know.
TENET: Where the rest of SYL goes to die
You may remember Zachary mentioning Tenet some time ago on the podcast. The then side project from Strapping Young Lad’s second guitar, Jed Simon, has apparently evolved now into a full band. And guess who is joining Mr. Simon in this new adventure? The Fat Duo of Doom of course, Byron Stroud and Gene Hoglan.
We didn’t think much of the demo tracks back then and I still don’t think much of them now. There’s 2 of them up on their MySpace which are from their Century Media debut album, “Sovereign”, which is apparently out already. They’re pretty much generic old-school thrash/speed metal with the addition of weird vocals. And no keyboards because Jed Simon says keyboards in metal bands are gay.
Fucking Boris
Japan-fags Boris have released a teaser video for the upcoming “Heavy Rock Hits Vol.2″. The song featured is not spectacular, but the video is fun enough to watch, because when the Japanese want to dress up tongue-in-cheek like an 80′s hair band… They go balls out.
As it pertains to Hell
The days of trying to figure out what is that special something that is missing from your life are over my friends, Ov Hell is here! Check it out:
Out of Norway’s biggest and darkest metal bands rises Ov HELL. This group of Satan’s all-stars has been sharpening their teeth in some of black metal’s most influential bands for many years. Known as key figures in bands such as Dimmu Borgir and Gorgoroth, Shagrath and King have come together to bring forward a new chapter in Norwegian black metal history. Ov HELL will carry on in the same tradition for which King and Shagrath are known, but the collaboration between the two will mark a new era for them both.
Frost, Ice Dale and Teloch have been recruited for the first full-length release. The album will contain all of the power and blast beats worthy of their evil pedigrees. Expect an assault on all false gods and hypocrisy that is of this world today…..