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NUCLEAR BLAST: This is getting ridiculous of Fire

Guess what? Nuclear Blast signed on yet another metal band. And it’s mother-dragon-fucking Rhapsody no less. Is there nothing sacred anymore? Also, they’re coming up with a new album, “The Frozen Tears of Angels”.

I had to go to a new paragraph here to give you some time to assimilate/stop laughing at Rhapsody’s new album title. Seems like production and mixing duties will still be performed by the Luca-Alex duo and “valorous” friend of the band Sascha Paeth. In their official site, they comment on the theme of the new album, which will continue the amazing “Dark Secret Saga” and further Luca Turilli’s use of retarded imagination for concept music album purposes.

Now you may just be reading this sitting comfortably in front of your computer and think nothing more of it. But I see what’s really going on…

These motherfuckers at Nuclear Blast are simply a part of the great Reptilian system that controls our world, and they’re doing their part by absorbing every single metal band on the planet. And when they do the entirety of metaldom will be at the mercy of a single entity.

One Label to rule them all, One Label to find them, One Label to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.

But fear not my beloved metal kin, for Metalscape will not lie on the ground and allow itself to get run over by these monsters. Zach’s infiltration into the US armed forces is only the beginning of our counter strike. If you want to support the cause and show these fuckers you will not bow down to them, you can do so by wearing the Colors of Truth.

3 Responses to “NUCLEAR BLAST: This is getting ridiculous of Fire”
  • burp says:

    That post title will haunt my dreams forever.

  • Hugo says:

    You are…. how I’m going to say this in wors you can understand… You are a fucking racist.
    If you don’t like power metal bands/ symphonic power metal bands keep it to your self. Rhapsody of Fire is a great band, not of my favorite style but i respect it.
    And you know who is ridiculous? People like you that think they will make a change in the world with none sense comments about a subject they don’t know sheet about.

    Don’t bother to reply.

  • Paul says:

    Hugo: How is this post about how Rhapsody is traditionally a corny wizards-and-dragons band, and how Nuclear Blast is growing at a frightening band in any way racist?

    Telling it like it is about Rhapsody is hardly a crime – I say that they are everyone’s worst impression of power metal while I sit listening to the new album, enjoying it. Don’t take yourself so seriously.

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