I had to go to a new paragraph here to give you some time to assimilate/stop laughing at Rhapsody’s new album title. Seems like production and mixing duties will still be performed by the Luca-Alex duo and “valorous” friend of the band Sascha Paeth. In their official site, they comment on the theme of the new album, which will continue the amazing “Dark Secret Saga” and further Luca Turilli’s use of retarded imagination for concept music album purposes.

Now you may just be reading this sitting comfortably in front of your computer and think nothing more of it. But I see what’s really going on…

These motherfuckers at Nuclear Blast are simply a part of the great Reptilian system that controls our world, and they’re doing their part by absorbing every single metal band on the planet. And when they do the entirety of metaldom will be at the mercy of a single entity.

One Label to rule them all, One Label to find them, One Label to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.

But fear not my beloved metal kin, for Metalscape will not lie on the ground and allow itself to get run over by these monsters. Zach’s infiltration into the US armed forces is only the beginning of our counter strike. If you want to support the cause and show these fuckers you will not bow down to them, you can do so by wearing the Colors of Truth.

A weird move by the massive band black hole that is Nuclear Blast, since Symphony X have already released the shitfest of an album more popularly known as “Paradise Lost”, and the label’s Modus Operandi so far seems to pick up bands at the peak of their popularity/talent and then work them like illegal Mexicans to release terrible albums every 3 months until either their contract expires or they die of exhaustion (both of which happen to coincide).

At least the new Symphony X album (due in Spring 2010!) will hopefully have some updated production, if the suits manage to pry away the mixing board from Michael Romeo’s cold, dead hands. And maybe they can do something about their fucking ugly ass website.

FINNTROLL, Century Media Records and King Foo Entertainment announce the signing of a worldwide deal to unleash the next three FINNTROLL albums.

FINNTROLL adds: “Yeah, that’s right peeps. We’re most enthusiastic to announce our signing with Century Media Records. We decided to continue our long co-op with CM, thanks to Jens ‘very special’ Prueter and Mr. Rosie of King Foo. FINNTROLL felt it’s time to work directly with CM this time as we have all the trust with them and they have never let us down in the past. Our new album will be released worldwide through CM in early 2010, and with that said we’re gonna do some heavy touring, that’s gonna start in February in Europe and after that we’re gonna sail across the ocean to North America. See ya on the road

You’re an unsigned band playing a local show and someone approaches you claiming to represent Nuclear Blast Records or Metal Blade Records. They say they want to sign you, book studio time for your band, buy you plane tickets, or even put you on Ozzfest, yet no contracts are ever involved. Sound too good to be true? That’s because it is.

There’s been a rash of imposters in several states claiming all of the above and more. Some try to extort money from bands by claiming they need it to place a deposit on whatever it is they’re promising. Others want free entry into a show, free CDs & band merchandise, or backstage access. Whatever the case, what’s clear is that these imposters have such low-self esteem that they’re willing to lie about who they are.

Bands, DO NOT LET YOUR HOPES OF GETTING SIGNED BLINDSIDE YOU. Staff members at Nuclear Blast and Metal Blade:

- conduct official business via their official office e-mail & telephone number.

- can produce a business card with the label’s logo, official office address, and official telephone number.

- NEVER ask unsigned bands for “deposit” money.

Nuclear Blast and Metal Blade Records wish to keep their reputations among metal fans and metal musicians in good standing, as we understand how hard bands work to bring their music to the metal community. These imposters are mocking everything we stand for as independent metal labels, as musicians, and as fans.

If ANYONE approaches your band claiming to be from a label and asks for money, for free entry into a show, free CDs or merchandise, or backstage access, your FIRST response should be to be skeptical.

Call the label asking to verify staff names and positions. Or, take your photo with the imposter/impersonator and send it to the label’s general e-mail address to inform them of what they are promising.

Nuclear Blast’s general e-mail address is: mail@nuclearblastusa.com

Metal Blade’s general e-mail address is: metalblade@metalblade.com

I guess you’d have to be pretty dumb to actually believe some random guy that comes up to you claiming to be a record label rep wanting to sign your band and asking money for it. Then again, with Nuclear Blast signing every single metal band with a Myspace out there, it’s not that far of a stretch.

Good for Vader, they’re a great band with an even greater trajectory so they deserve it. They have a new album coming up, “Necropolis”, which features Decapitated guitar player and main composer Vogg sharing axe-slinging duties with Piotr. It’ll be interesting to see if he inputs anything into the new album musically, although I doubt it.

Here’s a cool video I found on Vader’s Myspace, a studio diary. Dunno how you feel about those, but I love studio diaries. Especially if they’re Vader’s; you may not like their music, but their production is amazingly awesome. This is part I of the report which features the band’s skin beater, Paweł Jaroszewicz, recording tracks at Hertz Studio in Poland. Sweet stuff, check it out.