Normally I could give a shit about Taylor Swift, but if this was the actual cover of any of her albums I would definitely buy at least 5 copies, because anyone who loves dragons as much as Rhapsody of Fire, Taylor Swift and myself should be supported no matter what.

And if that wasn’t enough, they’ve also posted a TOTALLY NEW SONG OFF THE ALBUM! WHICH YOU CAN DOWNLOAD!!!! But if you just want to listen to it, here you go; It’s called “Sea of Fate” and it is so epic in its underwhelming it’s completely of fire:

The Motherfucking Frozen Tears of Angels comes out on April 30th.

I had to go to a new paragraph here to give you some time to assimilate/stop laughing at Rhapsody’s new album title. Seems like production and mixing duties will still be performed by the Luca-Alex duo and “valorous” friend of the band Sascha Paeth. In their official site, they comment on the theme of the new album, which will continue the amazing “Dark Secret Saga” and further Luca Turilli’s use of retarded imagination for concept music album purposes.

Now you may just be reading this sitting comfortably in front of your computer and think nothing more of it. But I see what’s really going on…

These motherfuckers at Nuclear Blast are simply a part of the great Reptilian system that controls our world, and they’re doing their part by absorbing every single metal band on the planet. And when they do the entirety of metaldom will be at the mercy of a single entity.

One Label to rule them all, One Label to find them, One Label to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.

But fear not my beloved metal kin, for Metalscape will not lie on the ground and allow itself to get run over by these monsters. Zach’s infiltration into the US armed forces is only the beginning of our counter strike. If you want to support the cause and show these fuckers you will not bow down to them, you can do so by wearing the Colors of Truth.